8 Weeks... (Oct. 2016)
Originally posted Sunday 16th October 2016
After 56 days / 8 weeks and it all seemed to be going swimmingly.
8 Weeks…. a catch up and stuff
I feel like a terrible fraud.
I started blogging about giving up alcohol after reading so many inspirational blogs and thinking to myself “yes, that’s the answer, don’t try to cut down, stop trying to moderate. Just STOP DRINKING.”
I Stopped.
And I thought I’d blog about it, to make sure I had a public record to keep me focussed – and to remind myself of why I decided to stop in the first place. I never expected to have readers. I never expected those readers to look at my little blog in the same way I’d looked at those other, real, inspirational blogs.
So…here I am.
I made my last post just over 2 weeks ago, and then, I don’t know what happened but I stopped checking other blogs, and had no real ideas of what to write about in my own blog.
I just get on with life.
In these last two weeks I’ve not had a drink, not been tempted to have a drink, not felt any real regrets at not drinking (apart from the usual Friday Night anticipation which quickly gets squashed). It is my New Normal – not drinking. Instead of thinking each night “I can’t have a drink” I now think “I’m glad I’m not having a drink”.
Or don’t think about it at all….
I just get on with life.
We’ve been to the cinema on Sunday afternoons for the last few weeks. That’s a New Thing. Perhaps it’s tied in with Not Drinking?
I’ve felt more “open”, more “happy”, less “angsty”.
Almost intangible, probably not evident from the outside yet, but I feel different inside.
I’ve started de-cluttering. My hobby (as I’ve mentioned previously) is Radio. Tinkering with radios, building radios, doing “experiments” via radio. Over the years I’ve accumulated lots of stuff. Too much stuff. I’ve looked at it all recently and thought “do I use all of this stuff, or did I just buy it on a whim, play around with it for a few weeks and then leave it on a shelf, in a cupboard, lying around?” I’ve been busy selling it on eBay. I’ve made space on the shelves, in the boxes and cupboards. Not for MORE STUFF, but just Space.
Space physically, and also Space in my head, where I don’t feel guilty for hoarding so much unused, un-needed stuff.
The money I’m getting from this de-cluttering is going towards a treat. For me. To mark my success in quitting the drink.
Reading Soberman365’s blog this morning – his own 40th Birthday Party. Sober. https://soberman365.blogspot.co.uk/2016/10/surviving-40th.html
Excellent stuff.
As a coincidence I was at a 40th Birthday Party last night. Sober. It was the best fun I’ve had at a party, ever. I’m not a party person, and usually sit at a table far from the dance floor, with a few friends and we drink. That’s what a party is for. Drinking until you can escape and go home. Drinking to take your mind off the fact that you’re at a party.
Last night was different…
Mrs. MIT works for a Social Enterprise company which exists to give disabled adults work experience, hoping to give them skills needed to go on and find real jobs, in the real world. In reality its role is to give them meaningful distraction from their disability, provide some stimulation, some therapy, interactions with the general public etc. And also some respite for their carers.
It’s a Very Good Thing. And I’m very proud of her for getting involved with it. She started as a volunteer and eventually got a full time job with them.
There are several “participants” with Downs Syndrome and it was one of these guy's 40th Birthday Party last night. We went, but didn’t expect to stay all night – Mrs MIT was there because of her connection through work, and many other colleagues were going to be there. We thought we’d stay for a couple of hours, and then leave. Be sociable but not over stay our welcome.
We arrived at 8:30pm
We left at 1:15am
After the disco/karaoke had finished and the taxis were queuing up to take the revellers home.
The time flew by. I’d glanced at my watch once, noticed it was already 11:45…. WTF?
Mrs MIT and me don’t dance. Not even Drunken Dancing. I can count the number of times we’ve been on a dance floor at a party on the fingers of a boxing glove – and that’s after 27 years of marriage.
We danced. And danced…. (shuffled vaguely in time to the music, truth be told).
We didn’t need alcohol (Mrs MIT had three glasses of wine over the whole night, I had 1 ginger beer and 1 Coke), we just got caught up in the mood. It was inspirational to see the people Mrs MIT works with, who have varying “disabilities,” up on the floor, enjoying the music. Dancing. One guy was profoundly deaf. Didn’t stop him from joining in. Danced better than I did.
There was karaoke. We didn’t….. That would be a step too far.
We did, though, join in raucously with all the choruses, adding to the noise. Having fun.
One thing that stood out was that although there was a bar, and a few people were drinking, there wasn’t a normal party drinking atmosphere. The one or two people who were drinking too much really, really stood out. And not in a good way. The rest of the guests (around 100?) were there for other things. Drink wasn’t the purpose of the party. It was to give one guy a 40th birthday to remember.
At 1:15am we wandered out into the teeth of a storm, rain, strong winds. Battled our way to the car and then drove the 30-odd miles home. Got back just before 2am.
Made mugs of tea. A proper night cap.
One of the Karaoke songs that was sung at the party was “Salute!” – we didn’t know the song, or the group who sang it, but it was oddly uplifting to hear it sung by a little girl, about 10 years old with her mum beside her, singing along.
Mrs MIT and me are 50, no kids, no up-to-date pop knowledge. We didn’t know the song, or the group who sang it…
So we You Tubed it and sat watching it at 2am, singing along while we had our tea.
A perfect end to a perfect, sober, night.
Enjoy… Salute, Little Mix